Books to Make You Laugh & Think
booklist by JonIrwin
DJR Suggested Reads
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The Canterville Ghost, by Oscar Wilde
At eleven o'clock the family retired, and by half-past all the lights were out. Some time after, Mr. Otis was awakened by a curious noise in the corridor, outside his room. It sounded like the clank of metal, and seemed to be coming nearer every moment. He got up at once, struck a match, and looked at the time. It was exactly one o'clock. He was quite calm, and felt his pulse, which was not at all feverish. The strange noise still continued, and with it he heard distinctly the sound of footsteps. He put on his slippers, took a small oblong phial out of his dressing-case, and opened the door. Right in front of him he saw, in the wan moonlight, an old man of terrible aspect. His eyes were as red burning coals; long grey hair fell over his shoulders in matted coils; his garments, which were of antique cut, were soiled and ragged, and from his wrists and ankles hung heavy manacles and rusty gyves.

'My dear sir,' said Mr. Otis,'I really must insist on your oiling those chains, and have brought you for that purpose a small bottle of the Tammany Rising Sun Lubricator. It is said to be completely efficacious upon one application, and there are several testimonials to that effect on the wrapper from some of our most eminent native divines. I shall leave it here for you by the bedroom candles, and will be happy to supply you with more should you require it.' With these words the United States Minister laid the bottle down on a marble table, and, closing his door, retired to rest.
 
 
The Day of the Locust, by Nathaniel West
She went on and on, telling him [Claude] how careers are made in the movies and how she intended to make hers. It was all nonsense. She mixed bits of badly understood advice from the trade papers with other bits out of the fan magazines and compared these with the legends that surrounded the activities of screen stars and executives. Without any noticeable transition, possibilities became probabilities and wound up as inevitabilities. At first she occasionally stopped and waited for Claude to chorus a hearty agreement, but when she had a good start, all her questions were rhetorical and the stream of the words rippled on without a break.
 
 
Povel, by Geraldine Kim
An addiction to online self-quizzes. Some lampposts are more yellow than others. He walks with his hips first. Drivers have already turned on their headlights. Baby pigeons. I’d rather see an exhibit of Petra than visit Petra itself. What I just wrote is a lie. My roommate asks me where I got the tea. ‘The deli on 9th St,’ I say, ‘Epicurean Deli?’ she asks. ‘Yeah,’ I say. I say, ‘They should call it Epi-Korean deli because of the people that— ‘I love chamomile,’ she says. Spilt liquid and yellow Caution Caution Caution tape between two trashcans. Someone took the time to plant lilacs. He said my line breaks were ‘weird.’ I wonder how much my soul would be worth on eBay.
 
 
Theatre Writings, by Kenneth Tynan
He [Welles] must choose "Moby Dick," a book whose setting is the open sea, whose hero is more mountain than man and more symbol than either, and whose villain is the supremely unstagable whale. He must take as his raw material Melville's prose, itself as stormy as the sea it speaks of, with a thousand wrecked metaphors clinging on its surface to frail spars of sense. You do not dip into Melville, you jump in, holding your nose and praying not to be drowned. If prose styles were women, Melville's would be painted by Rubens and cartooned by Blake: it is a shot-gun wedding of sensuousness and metaphysics. Yet out of all these impossibilities Mr. Welles has fashioned a piece of pure theatrical megalomania: a sustained assault on the senses which dwarfs anything London has seen since, perhaps, the Great Fire.
 
 
The Manchurian Candidate, by Richard Condon
What is the consciousness of guilt but the arena floor rushing up to meet the falling trapeze artist? Without it, a bullet becomes a tourist flying without responsibility through the air. The consciousness of guilt gives a scent to humanity, a threat of putrefaction, the ultimate cosmetic. Without the consciousness of guilt, existence had become so bland in Paradise that Eve welcomed the pungency of Original Sin. Raymond's consciousness of guilt, that rouged lip print of original sin, had been wiped off. He had been made unique. He had been shriven into eternity, exculpated of the consciousness of guilt.
 
 
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